First, some good news: I’ve got new pics, and despite not really liking my hairdo, I look pretty darn good.
The skirt I’m wearing is a 12, but it’s very loose. This was taken after I’d been to Wal-Mart and successfully fit into 8′s.
So as you look at this picture, what do you see? Do you see a woman who’s done losing weight? Well, I don’t. I’m still 25 pounds away from what is considered a normal, healthy weight for my height.
And underneath the clothes, there is is definitely plenty of fat still hanging around.
But here’s the part I’m irritated about. I have friends (more than one) who have taken me aside in recent days to ask, “Aren’t you done losing weight? Surely you don’t want to lose any more!”
When I reply that yes, I have 25 more pounds to go the response is something like, “But you look good now! You need to stop!”
And this frustrates me to no end. Don’t you think I know my own body? Don’t you think I know whether or not there is fat there that needs to go?
Do they think I’m going to become aneorexic?
I had gastric bypass surgery because I wanted to be fit. I had a goal in mind, a picture of what I wanted to look like. No, it isn’t supermodel thin. And yes, I know I’ll never have that perfect, swimsuit-model airbrushed looking body. But I also don’t intend to go through all I’ve been through and stop when I still have handfulls of fat hanging from my stomach, love handles on my hips and saddlebags on my thighs.
In other words, I didn’t take my life in my hands under the surgeon’s knife, endure hell week, give up any possiblitiy of a Coke or birthday cake or any number of other foods for the rest of my life just to quit 25 pounds away from the finish because other people think I look good. I’m in this to finish it!
Here’s another pic, along with a “before” version so you can see how far I’ve come:
So why do you think people want me to stop now? Because as I look at that current pic, I can even see with clothes ON where the excess fat is.
I don’t know. The other day I posted about being a little scared of the thought of me in an 8 or even below. I’m starting to come to grips with the fact that I’ll be at least a 6, maybe even a 4 after I lose the next 25 pounds. That is me. I’m just smaller framed than I thought I was when I wore a 24.
And nobody is going to stop me from achieving it. I’m going to work at it till I get there. And you know what? If I wind up rockin’ a size TWO, then people will just have to deal with it. They can either be happy, or be jealous of my hotness. Cuz I’m going to reach my goal!
