Last night I had a serious attack from the hunger monster. I was at a friend’s house, and they had pizza. I ate one slice, then another 1/2 of a small one. Before leaving a couple of hours later, I tried to eat another slice, just because, well.. it was there. But only half of it would fit.
Now, back in the day, I could eat 4+ pieces at a sitting, so barely being able to manage 2.5 over the course of an evening is a vast improvement. Nothing to stress over, really.
But once I got home, on the other hand…
I just felt hungry. Not head hunger, but genuine empty-stomach hunger. I suppose it could have been in my head, but it sure felt real. So I ate the other half of the piece of pizza I’d started (brought it home). Then a little later I had chips and salsa. Then a little later I had a cup of sugar free jello pudding. (Those cups are small, but usually they are enough to make me feel like I’ve had something, you know?)
I was up late watching re-runs of Miami Vice on video, and actually grabbed the bag of chips again! That’s when I really caught myself. Granted, all the portions I’d had so far had been small, but at this point they were really adding up!
So today, I skipped my morning ritual of stepping on the scale as soon as I woke up. I kinda don’t wanna know. I walked a little extra in addition to my usual 2.4 miles.
But other than that, I’m not going to worry about it. Today I feel much more normal, and have made very healthy food choices.
The bottom line is that I no longer feel the need to punish myself for falling off the wagon. It happens, I move on. No panic, no guilt, no problems. I can’t tell you how liberating that feels!
What I have now is a healthy lifestyle. 95+% of my choices are good ones. So when the occasional lapses happen, it’s finally easy to just roll on and forget about it.
So yesterday, I blew it. And today, I am lovin’ the post-gastric bypass life!