One Month After Gastric Bypass: Buyers Remorse

At some point in the first month after gastric bypass surgery, nearly everyone has at least one moment of “oh, my God what have I DONE?”

 

Of course, at this point it’s too late. The deed is done and you just have to live with the consequences.

 

I’ve heard many people say, “If I had known it would be like this I would have thought longer and harder about having this surgery.”

 

Unfortunately, you just don’t hear a lot about this aspect of the gastric bypass experience. Sure, they try to warn you with statistics about complications and tell you it’s not easy. They try and point out that it’s a huge life change, yada yada yada.

 

But most of us really only look at the end result: I will be thin if I have this operation. And we’re so desperate for that outcome that it’s really hard to get this side of the story to sink in.

 

Well, it’s GOT to sink in. Not just to be sure you’re making an informed decision, but so you’ll be prepared and the hard parts won’t hit you in the teeth like a sledgehammer.

 

Listen to me: THERE WILL BE VERY DIFFICULT DAYS AHEAD. Do you understand? There will be times you will look to the sky and beg God to go back in time and tell you not to do this to yourself.

 

And no, you will NOT be the exception.

 

Nobody – absolutely NOBODY – breezes through this experience with nary a regret or tear shed. Aspects of this surgery and the ensuing life change are extremely unpleasant.

 

The question you have to answer for yourself is whether or not the unpleasantness is worth the end result. Is what you will go through and how you will end up better or worse than doing nothing and possibly always being overweight?

 

Nobody can answer that for you. But you need all the facts if you’re going to answer it for yourself.

 

With that in mind, here are some of the experiences I had, and have heard about from friends and acquaintances following gastric bypass surgery:

 

I Can’t Stop Crying

 

The first days and weeks after surgery were the worst emotional roller coaster I think I’ve ever been on.

 

Suddenly, I was an outsider in my own home. In a family that has always made sitting around the dinner table together a priority, I no longer fit in. I was excluded from something that had always been a bonding moment.

 

I felt so alone and desolate. I can’t describe how much it hurt.

 

A friend of mine had extended family in to help with recovery. As a way of saying thank you, her husband cooked them a big, nice dinner the day before they were leaving. His intentions were nothing but good, to show appreciation for the help they had gotten. My friend saw the food and the togetherness and spent the next hour having an emotional meltdown.

 

The upheaval after this surgery is just as big as bringing your first baby home from the hospital. Parents will understand what I mean. It is an intense, trial-by-fire kind of thing and absolutely nothing in your life is ever the same again.

 

Mood swings are incredible. One moment you’re full of hope, the next you’re in the depths of despair. Many people say they spend hours just crying. Your body hurts, you can’t stand up straight, and one of your principal comforts in life has just been taken away from you.

 

It’s little wonder that so many experience such deep bouts of depression at this time.

 

My Former Best Friend Has Become My Enemy

 

Food. We’ve relied on it for so long. Turned to it for comfort, used it to bond or even just for something to do when we were bored. Suddenly, it’s just not there.

 

But you still have to watch everyone around you eat. And you still have to endure all those late-night commercials. I had never noticed how many restaurants advertise after 9:00 or 10:00 at night until after my surgery. And never in my life have I wanted a bucket of Extra Crispy and some mashed potatoes so bad!!

 

Yet all you can have for the first couple of weeks or more are liquids. After that, as you get bumped up to soft foods the fun really begins.

 

I’ll never forget my first egg. I was sooo excited to eat it. Then I was sooo sick and threw it up. Reintroducing every single food back into your diet is a roll of the dice. Will it hurt miserably going down? Will it spark dumping syndrome and make me wish I was dead?

 

Let me describe dumping syndrome to you: You eat. You chew the crap out of it, eat it slowly and all that. Then around the time you finish, it starts: You break out in a sweat. You’re overwhelmingly nauseas and your pulse begins to pound. Some people have pain, others feel dizzy. Everyone is absolutely miserable.

 

It can make you afraid to eat anything, and that only adds to your emotional distress.

 

But even worse than dumping is the pain that can come from eating something your pouch just doesn’t like. It can feel like you’re literally ripping your stomach in half – and that’s in addition to the pain you still have from surgery.

 

You have to quickly come to terms with the fact that you are no longer in charge of your eating decisions. That control has been supplanted by an alien life form also known as your pouch. And you have just become it’s slave.

 

The alien known as your pouch is under no obligation whatsoever to accommodate your mental cravings or desires. Neither is it at all bound by rules of consistency. It may love something today, and throw a hissy fit when you eat the same thing tomorrow. There sometimes is no detectable rhyme or reason behind it’s actions, yet you must appease it’s whims and desires with every tidbit that passes your lips. If you don’t, rest assured you WILL be sorry.

 

I Can’t Eat, Yet I’m Constantly Shoving Something In My Mouth

 

I’ve mentioned this elsewhere, but it bears repeating. You will be amazed at how much thought and effort you are now putting into consuming 64oz of water, 60+ grams of protein, plus daily calcium, multivitamin and iron supplements.

 

You are constantly keeping track of these things, counting ounces and grams and time to take supplements. It can quickly consume your entire day.

 

And, horror of horrors, many people find themselves suddenly unable to tolerate these things they need so desperately to stay healthy.

 

What do you do when drinking water hurts your pouch? Of if you cannot tolerate the taste of any protein supplement? Of if the calcium tablets you have to chew are so chalky they make you gag?

 

You have to force yourself. You have to keep trying until you find a way to make it work. Maybe there’s yet another protein supplement out there you haven’t tried. Maybe adding a squirt of lemon or some Crystal Light to your water will help.

 

If you don’t force yourself, you get sick as a dog stinking quick. You’ll have no energy, you’ll be dizzy and crabby (well, crabbier) and what’s worse, it will contribute to your inevitable first plateau.

 

WHAT?!? All This Trauma And I’m STILL Not Losing Weight?

 

About one month out is usually when we get the biggest, most painful kick in the teeth gastric bypass will ever throw at us:

 

Suddenly, the scale just stops moving. Worse, on occasion it can even move a few pounds back UP!

 

The screams of utter panic and frustration are usually heard throughout your entire neighborhood. Children and small animals run for cover. HOW can this BE? Did my surgeon trick me? Did they just cut me open and sew me back together for laughs?

 

Am I going to be the only human being in the history of medicine that has had this surgery and not lost any weight?

 

And don’t forget the fact that everyone you know, who also knows you had surgery, will be pressing you for constant updates on your progress. Just imagine how much worse it will feel when you’re devastated by the fact that you’ve been stuck for a week or more, and have to repeat that fact at least 3 times a day to people you aren’t really that close to to begin with.

 

Yeah. It sucks.

 

This plateau is only the first of many you will experience. But being the first, it’s also the hardest.

 

“Doggone it,” you may say, “I went through hell in order to lose weight. I can handle hell if only I also have the reward of seeing this fat melt away. But if the fat isn’t melting then I’m going through hell for NOTHING!!”

 

Again, at this point, children and small animals should seek some form of cover for their own safety.

 

It can last anywhere from a week to a month or more. Yes, it will eventually end and you’ll start losing again. But the frustration and pain you endure in the meantime is mind blowing.

 

You can make this plateau a little easier to bear in a couple of different ways: First, don’t weigh every day. (Nobody I know is able to pull that one off, but hey, it would probably help if you could. Maybe you can. I still can’t.) Second, measure yourself. Because even when you’re not losing pounds you can be losing inches. And knowing that can help. Somewhat.

 

How Did I Ever Become Friends With So Many Obnoxious People?

 

Get ready. For some reason, weight loss surgery is an intensely emotional topic for a whole lot of people. Even ones who’ve never had weight problems (who I think should just keep quiet, but of course they think just the opposite.)

 

In addition to the constant, “SO, how much weight have you lost?” refrain, you’ll hear things like:

  • “I could NEVER live like that! How could you do that to your body?”
  • “I’m losing weight the hard way. You took the easy way out.” (This one is particularly galling after going through everything on this page. Even harder is mustering up the smile and the hopefully-sincere congratulations you are then obligated to offer.)
  • “So-and-so had that. She did great for a while, but now she’s gained it all back and then some. In fact, such-and-such had it, too. She lost a slew of weight, left her husband and shacked up with Whats-his-face. Now she’s piling the weight back on, too. Oh, and then there’s Whatsername, you know, her grandma’s sister-in-law’s cousin is in my Sunday school class. She up and died 6 weeks after her surgery. But I’m sure you’ll do fine.”
  • “How much can you eat? OMG that’s so small!”
  • “Why can’t you just not eat and save yourself all this trouble?”
  • “Well, you did this to yourself, you’ll just have to live with it.”
  • “Oh, we’re going out to eat. Maybe next time we’ll think of something you can do, too.”

You’ll also hear lots of support and encouragement from the truly wonderful people in your life. Cling to it. It will be your salvation.

 

Now You Know – Did It Sink In?

 

Everyone is different. Some have an easier time than others. But the above is a fairly accurate representation of the first month or two for most of us.

 

If you’ve already had surgery, I hope you found the trip down memory lane amusing at least. I’d love for you to add your comments below.

 

But if you’re still on the other side of the knife, I hope this has opened your eyes. Gastric bypass surgery is NOT the easy way out. It’s NOT all sunshine and roses. It’s an incredibly huge life change, and it can be downright traumatic.

 

This trauma doesn’t last forever. And lots of good things come in the days and months ahead. But you have to get through the tough part first.

 

Whether the trauma is worth it is the decision you have to make.

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62 Responses to One Month After Gastric Bypass: Buyers Remorse

  1. I underwent a Roux en Y bypass on January 24, 2011. The abdominal pain during the first 24 hours was excruciating. I would place it on par with the kidney stone pain I had years ago. The nurse contacted my medical team during the night to change my pain meds from morphine to something 6 times more powerful. Even that barely touched the pain that first night. The morning after my surgery I vomited up a large amount of black, clotted blood mixed with some fresh, red blood. The pain level dropped almost instantly and I was able to sip water without pain for the first time. My pouch was obviously filled and obstructed with blood. Other than this complication, my first two weeks post-op has been really good. It is strange to lose your general appetite for food and to make a career out of taking in enough protein and liquids each day. I was 294 the day of surgery and weighed in this morning at 262. The scale hasn’t moved from that number for the past 4 days but it sounds like that is going to happen from time to time. It is nice to read about the experiences of others and to share our own. Thanks for this thread!

  2. I am two weeks out from my surgery. I had it on January 17. I’m sorry you have had such trouble. When I started my liquid diet on January 5, I weighed 362 lbs. This morning I weighed 315 lbs. So that’s 47 pounds in less than a month. I’m very happy with that, but like many, wish it were more. I’ve just moved into the mush part of the post-op diet. I’ve not had any nausea at all. I’ve started eating lightly pureed shrimp, ham and chicken for protein. Had some cauliflower last night and will have more today. I haven’t had the emotional ups and downs that many speak of but I am only two weeks out. I hope I handle the plauteaus as well as many have here but time will tell. All in all, the first two weeks have gone very very well. No throwing up and not having much difficulty watcing the rest of my family eat. We eat together, just different things. I am 60 and thought things might be more difficult because of my age, but they haven’t so far. I want to lose about another 100 lbs. and look forward to this summer. Thans for listening.

  3. I’d just like to say that I had my gastric bypass last year, so far I’ve lost over 100lbs, and not once did I have a moment where I wished that I didn’t have the surgery, or regretted it. Not once.

  4. Yes i had mine on the 12th and im eating mushed foods but it doesnt seem to make me full or they say to eat untill your full but I dont get that feeling of full. Also Im constantly have some kind of hunger for something but nothing taste good. But on the plus size.. no pun intended, Ive went from 340 lbs to 313 in one month.

  5. Just read you’re article about bypass surgery. I am so sorry you had such a difficult time however, I am so glad I did not read this before surgery because I probably would have backed out. That is when I had my major doubt faze. Like do I really want to go through with this and especially since my surgery was Dec. 22, 2010 right at Christmas was I completely nuts? Now being almost one month post op I can honestly say I have had none of the problems that have been described other that my 29 pound plateau. (It SUCKS) Can eat anything I want, which I am trying to only want healthier choices and seem to be doing well now. Just ate a salad with grilled chicken and fat free dressing. Had no problem. No problem with spicy foods. No gas problems. However I do hate the vitamins. The only problem I am having and hope some one out there in surgery land can help me is that I still do not get that full feeling. Seems like there is no restriction on the amount I can eat. Does anyone else have this sensation?

  6. I had my Gastric Bypass Surgery Nov. 30 2010. My first post-op visit, 1 week out, I lost 13 pounds. I go back to the Dr for my 6 weeks post- op visit and I am very eager to to see how much more weight i have lost. I really enjoy reading all of your stories they have given me hope in continue the struggle of losing weight.

  7. I’ve hit my first plateau, as you said about 1 month after surgery. I have a friend who had the same surgery 1 year earlier and she didn’t hit her plateau for months, at least not one that I heard about. It really gets frustrating seeing how she lost so much weight when you are just stuck in time, and nothing helps but just waiting and doing what your doctor tells you.

  8. I am 1 month postop from gastric bypass surgery and I have read all the horror stories above that would make the ordinary woman run for cover….but thank god I didn’t read this before I had my surgery (nov.29, 2010)..I am down almost 45 lbs….yes I have hit a plateau but am hoping the weight loss restarts soon….I have had no bad complications. I came home from the hospita l(in less than 2 days) and never went back to bed…the pain meds made my pain almost go away…and I started walking immediatedly….so far I have not found any food or drink that hurts my new tummy…have never experienced dumping…..I have more energy….no depression….My question to all these ladies is “did you have a doctor who is in the group of surgeons who practice at hospitals of excellence”? my doctor was one and he was incredible….anyone else???

  9. Wow it seems as though this is the most awful thing in thw world!!! You make death sou nd better but does it not make it all worth it or would you just have been happier fat.

  10. I am three and a half weeks out from surgery and have lost 25 pounds. My weight has also plateaued, and has been at a plateau for about a week and a half, or bouncing up and down within a three-pound weight range. It’s funny and comforting to read all these posts because everything everyone has written is the tape that is playing in my head, and yet I feel so much better after reading all these posts because I know that I’m not the one that has to go around telling everyone, “It just didn’t work on me.” I feel so much better knowing there are others who are or have experienced what I am experiencing and have gone on to lose their weight! Yippee!! So patience is the key here, which I have very little of.

    I am in the pureed phase and thought I’d be so excited to be able to have something other than broth, yogurt and cream of wheat. But honestly, it wasn’t that big of a deal. Knock on wood, everything that has gone into my stomach I have tolerated just fine. I’m so thankful and praising God for this. I am not eating sugar, so therefore I have not experienced “dumping”. I did have the “Oh God, what have I done” reaction after surgery. I agree with many others, it was the worst pain I’ve ever endured, and I didn’t expect that, so it made it even worse. I had two C-sections with no pain meds afterwards, so I don’t think I’m a baby, but be prepared that this is not an easy surgery, and the gas that comes from abdominal surgery is probably where most of the pain and discomfort comes from. If I can offer one piece of advice, STAY ON TOP OF YOUR PAIN MEDS.

    Once you get past the pain medication phase, it really is just being patient. I now know I have nothing to worry about. I am going to lose all my weight, and I am going to be healthy and thin! That’s the ultimate goal, and if it takes me one year or two, it doesn’t matter. What matters is that I have a life full of promise to look forward to. THANKS TO ALL FOR YOUR GREATLY INFORMATIVE POSTS!

  11. I had a lap band take down after trying with that for 5 years to loose weight and only gained. Now here I am in my hell week. Along with the lap band take down I had the gastric bypass. I’ve cried everyday, I hurt, I am so sick of the liquids and trying to get in my daily protein quota. My weight has been my whole focus for so long and for the first time I can honestly say I don’t care anymore. Of course it’s too late what’s done is done. I was driving into the hopsital in a major snow and icestorm and thought ok if I don’t make it, it wasn’t meant to be. I made it and said God give me a sign that I should be doing this. Five minutes later the doctor comes in and goes over my A1C from my preop labs, he tells me I’ve got Diabetes.
    For me that was my answer I asked God for, now I am literally days out trying to heal wondering what the heck I did to myself.
    No one around you will understand what you are going through. I started looking on the interenet to see if what I was experiencing was normal and I am thankful to have found it titled “hell week”, that describes my week and tells me I am not alone.

  12. I will be honest and tell all of you that prayer really does change things. I know that may sound strange for a bariatric surgery forum, but trust me, I went through some of these same exact symptoms: heart palpitations, major nausea, killer pains, “the dying feeling”, and more and it got so bad that the smells and looks of certain foods would make me literally want to run in a room and lock the door. One day I simply told God to remove all of these side effects and bad feelings from me and He did just that. I don’t know the moment He did and I didn’t care, I just know that now I can tolerate most of the things in the phased diets and in some areas I have been able to “advance” which is an accomplishment in and of itself. I beg you to try this. What harm can it do? You have tried liquids, protein, soft foods, sugar free foods, calling your doctor, vomiting, and other methods. I guarantee this one works. Be encouraged and remember, don’t be “scalebound.”

  13. Great Article!! I had the surgery on Nov. 10, 2010 and the first few days were sooo bad, I thought I was dying. I was starting to feel alot better then about 2 weeks ago i started having these stabbing burning pains in my lower left side, pretty close to my belly button, still have to see the doc to find out what that is. I have lost almost 25 pounds which is nice but I feel like crap everyday. I feel sick when I wake up in the morning so I eat something small then I feel even worse. Everytime I eat I feel like like crap. IDK what is going on, so I hope that it changes and gets better. Im always starving before I go to bed, I hate water so I drink ice tea all day long made with Truvia instead of real sugar. I can pretty much eat anything, just really small amounts and no hard meats yet, unless its like chili or something like that. But I just cant figure out why im still having pain and feeling like crap everyday.

  14. I had the surgery on November 17 so I am almost two weeks out and seem to be stuck. I lost 21lbs the first week and nothing since….and while I know 21lbs is a good start I did figure out that it is only all that extra weight we carry around in our colon and bowels. That kinda depressed me. Can someone tell me when the weight loss resumes? While I am happy to be out of the 300s I am anxious to continue on my journey to Skinnyville.

    I know I need to relax and its been less than 2 weeks…LOL…but my unrealistic expectations are poking at me.

  15. I am 4 weeks out from my surgery and there are definitely days when I wished I had not done this. On the bright side, I keep fitting into smaller and smaller clothes, I have lost 30 lbs of the 80 I need to lose, we save tons of money because food and going out to dinner are no longer what we do. I have had many sad days when everyone is eating and I can eat a pc of cheese. I have a very hard time getting in my protien as I am still only eating about a 1/4 cup, if that at each mean and I can not tolerate any kind of dry chicken, turkey. Actually, even if it is not dry, I just can not do it, I get this crushing feeling in my chest and I have to throw it up. This has been a very hard thing to do, harder than I ever imagined. But I do not see myself as a huge fat-a__ anymore. Overweight, yes, but not huge. I think it will be worth it when I can start to eat a little more. I do not get hungry so I have been literally surviving on 200-400 calories a day. Protien drinks, all kinds, make me nauseous. I have tried every one I can find. Sweets repulse me, esp chocolate. I have not had any dumping, but I have eaten no sugars, or at least under 3g if I have. Sweets are not my problem.

    If youa are considering this surgery, jsut cut your ties with the love of food now. That will be the hardest part. You will no longer live to eat, you will eat to live. There is really no joy in eating anymore, as it is such a small amount and by the time I swallow it it is just unsatisfying mush. So, I eat to live, period.

    I am not saying not to do it, bc if I had it to do over again, I would, but you do need to be ready. I think I was pretty ready and determined and I still have a hard time at family get togethers etc. Not bc I want the food, just bc my life used to revolve around it. I now find myself a bit repulsed by the amount of food people eat, including my husband. It is becoming a thing with me, watching unbelievably at what people eat. A whole new phenomenom.

  16. I know about 3 people who had the surgery and didn’t see the hard times. I have bee out for 3 months now I lost 30 lbs. It is funny cause I can’t keep anything down and still not losing the way I want. I am always in pain now. I am scared to eat most times cause I hate the way I feel. Then the pain, the throwing up sometimes with water. I wonder what did I do to myself. I had the doctors laughing when I told them I want my old stomach back and want to be fat and happy then skinny and sick and sad. I still feel like crap. Still waiting on the happy ending but for now I feel like crap.

  17. Wow I haven’t been on hear for a while and I see all the problems as I have had or may have lol My surgery was 8/16/10 and to date I am down 55 pounds 265-215 I am sooo hanging out to be under the 200 mark. I guess I have been lucky and I can eat bread, pasta and eggs. Although eggs tore me a new one just after surgery. I am really bad about drinking enough and I am so over the taste of water. But I have just been home to OZ and brought back some cordial to kill the tast. Hang in there everyone we can do it ! hahaha

  18. Butterball-no-more

    I am scheduled to have surgery on Dec. 14th and have been trying to soak up all the info I can about before and after the proceedure. So far, this site has been by far the most helpful in giving me a true perspective of what to expect during my journey. Many thanks to all for sharing. I also feel ready to expect the worst and pray for the best. God Bless…

  19. OMG thanks for the post I have been so upset wondering what have I done. I have lose 19-20lbs since surgrey I am about 5weeks out have not lost any in a week. I have been freakin out. Scared I was the only one that has had this done and has not lost weight. This was very soothing for me. Thanks Again!

  20. Wow, so many different experiences here. I don’t even have a date yet for my gastric bypass but know it will be in Jan sometime. I am still in the early stages (psych eval, nutrition classes, etc.) I am scared but excited to have the surgery but am going into it expecting the worst but hoping for the best. Thank you all for taking the time to post. It helps someone like me to stay informed and be ready for anything that comes my way. :)

  21. Well, here i am sitting here feeling all scared, because I have only lost 15 pounds in the last twelve weeks. I had my gastric bypass 27th Jan. 2010. Starting weight 286 pounds -182 pounds. That is 105.6 pounds lost in nine months. Pretty great, but it is never enough…. i have a lot of loose skin and bat wings, thighs wing, saggy ass and of course the skin on my belly still makes me look fat. I can eat whatever I eat. No dumping, I can eat sugar, bread beer, wine everything. I am a freak of nature. BUT, I know that I must be extremely careful, as I will gain it back. I have lost a lot of hair, but I had a lot to start with. It does not matter what people say, it is never easy to be a big person and it’s even more difficult to be a thin person. We have the weight of the world on our shoulders, kind of speak… I am hopping to get out of the overweight BMI section soon. 20 pounds and I will be ” normal” weight for my height. Can not believe I am just 20 pounds over weight. Feel surreal, yet scary. Good luck keep plugging along and lets all get our aha moments. Mine was being able to buy a pair of skinny leg low waist jeans in size12- 14 a month ago. A ha!

  22. This article is so true. I had my surgery on Aug 18, 2009 and to this day I still have problems. I still get the dumpling syndrome I dread eating things as it hurts so bad sometimes. Do I regret it? Sometimes yes. Was it worth it? yes I can do many things that I couldnt before with my friends and family. Do I miss things like bread? YES I do…For those that had the surgery recently just remember everyone is different. Dont rush yourself and STAY AWAY FROM SODA lol…I have found that my family and friends are very supportive and we all laugh when I eat off my hubbys plate why spend 20.00 on a plate in a restaurant. Dont drink out of a straw it causes gas and that hurts. Keep positive. I started at 275 and am at 162 as of yesterday. Make sure to see the nutrition at 9 months and EXERCISE

  23. Boni Courtright

    I went searching on the web this morning because I’ve been on a plateau for over a week now. Trinity’s comments echo almost exactly what I have been feeling. It was wonderful to realize I’m not the only one thinking “Hey, did my surgeon do the right procedure? I’m going to be the only person not to lose weight.”

    I am exactly 4 weeks out and have only lost 18 lbs. I started at 229lbs and want to get down to at least 135-140lbs.

    My stomach tolerates food quite well at this point — although too much sugar causes dumping syndrome. I found that out when I ate some full sugar yogurt by mistake. That was a HORRIBLE experience.

    The first 2-3 week or so after surgery I thought it was a terrible mistake because I was so miserable and thought my stomach would never feel right. Now I feel fine physically most of the time but am really depressed a lot. I think that just comes with all the adjustments my body is making. Plus the fact that I’ve quit losing weight. Just bounce around 211 to 212 for the past week or so. Scared me to death!

    After reading this blog I am feeling more reasonable and will rededicate myself to making sure I’m getting the proper nutrients in the form of proteins and calcium, and drinking enough water — something I always have trouble with.

    Thanks so much for this site. It has been a God sent.

  24. I am in tears right now, this morning was a hard one for me. I had my surgey on Sept. 28, 2010 and on the day of surgery I weighed 360 and today 330… I know that sounds great, 30 lbs down in almost a month but for the past week I have been stuck at 330. As the article stated, I am barely eating anything and I workout 3 to 4 times a week – why am I not losing is all I can think. I have been on an emotional roller coaster since the day of the surgery..

    All I kept seeing was the end result. All of the new clothes I would buy, all the trips I would take and the new me by my birthday in February. After reading this I can stop crying and know that I am not alone! I so felt alone and as if I was the only one who had this surgery and it wasn’t going to work for. And it’s funny because for the past two weeks all I could think was “did my surgeon even do the right procedure”.. Crazy huh! Thanks for letting me vent!

  25. thank you so much all the things you say are ture i thought i was going to be a loser but not one if weight reading your story and the others has helped me i finley stoped crying ready to live now

  26. Thanks for this article, it sounds soooo much like me! It’s almost like I wrote the article myself. I started at 439 pounds on July 27, 2010, and I am now at 337 pounds. It has been a exhausting and difficult road. I have been in the hospital 3 different times with 3 ulcers. The nausea is so bad that I couldnt keep anything not even water down. I havent dealt with nausea for a couple of weeks now since I am on the new meds, but thanks to my sister its been an easier road. I have alot of stress in my life being a single mother of 2, but she has helped alot. Along with my doctors in Cleveland they have been a great help. So I pray for all of you that have had the surgery and ones that are thinking about it. Make sure this is the right decision for YOU. Everyone is different.

  27. Thank you so much for your honest approach to the pitfalls of gastric bypass. I am having my surgery on Nov 16th and am very nervous about possible complications. I am an older patient than the norm, (I will be 62 yrs next Feb.) and realize I don’t have youth in my favor. The primary reason I am having the surgery done is to (hopefully) improve my co-morbidities. I have degenerative disk disease,(severe) HTN , bad knees(just had a knee replacement last May} Most of these DX’s due to many years of overweight. I might be worried about complications but the possibility of improving my conditions and health propels me to have the surgery and tuff it out. As for losing weight this “easy way”, I remember getting those comments from people after having a scheduled C-section with my 3rd baby 30 years ago. Believe me, it was not the “easy way” !! I had had my first baby the “hard way”-a normal delivery and knew the difference. I think it’s about the same with weight loss surgery and people are just ignorant. I wish I could lose weight and keep it off the “old fashion” way but have struggled for so many years without success and realize that miserable afterwards or not, I need a healthy body,{that’s the goal) just as having a healthy baby was 30 yrs ago Wish me Luck and God Bless You-thanks again.

  28. I keep thinking that I will be able to handle what will be thrown my way after my surgery Oct 20, 2010. I know it’s going to be very hard.After reading these stories I am even more scared. I have been overweight all my life, I am in physical pain constantly. I’m just so so scared !! Sunshine’s comments gave me some hope. Although I wonder about the 80 pounds you wanted to lose. I thought you had to be at the least 100 lbs overweight to have the surgery.

  29. It’s been three months since my surgery. I have lost 40 lbs. I am finally the size I was before I had my children. I have another 40 to go.

    The first month was the worst. There were many days I thought wth did I do to myself. But as the weight came off and the compliments were every where, no more regrets.

    As for food, SF Popsicles and fudgesicles were my life line. I no longer need them. I am aon a routine diet: coffee w/ sf creamer(it keeps me regular), and oatmeal for breakfast. Than 2 hours later, light and fit yogurt. For snack I always keep low fat mozzarella cheese sticks. I am getting better at drinking my water. I keep a 16 oz. bottle in every room so I won’t forget to drink. Lunch is the hardest for me, since I still don’t have an appetite. Dinner is a bit easier, chili, beans, chicken, fish or steak are my usual options. As for dessert, I keep sf pudding or lite fruit cups in the fridge. I do miss salads, still can’t handle the roughage. I often have to remind myself to eat since I no longer crave anything.

  30. It’s been 5 1/2 weeks since my surgery, and I’ve lost 31 pounds. My pouch won’t tolerate eggs, but other than that, I really haven’t had much trouble. I learned quickly that I have to chew my food very well and eat extremely slowly. I miss eating hot food! By the time I finish anything it’s cold. I’m so focused on protein that I don’t eat much else — does anyone else have that problem? I ate a banana the other day, but other than that, it’s been mostly protein. To feel more comfortable I’ve been sticking with “softer” foods like yogurt, oatmeal, mashed sweet potatoes (with protein added, of course), and skim string cheese. Goat cheese is fantastic.

  31. I am 3 days out and am in misery. Nothing agrees with my pouch. No liquid whether cold, warm or hot. I am depressed and question whether I made a mistake.

  32. Lisa Sanders

    Wow it was like reading what ive been living for the last week.This is HELL….

  33. Lisa Whitworth

    I am 2 months out and have lost 37 pounds. I have been really lucky and the scales keep going down each week and I pray it doesn’t stop. I am never hungry which I feel is weird but I can pretty much eat anything I want. Dairy is not bothering me , sugars arn’t bothering me neither. Taking the vitamins are though .. just want to puke at the though of taking them. And the though of eating a jello or pudding just makes me queazy. My energy is just comming back and my belly scar is healing good. Nearly have it completly healed as I poped a few stitches so have had a hole in my belly. It was about 1 1/2 inch long and about 1/2 in deep but is half that now. (I had complications so longer inscision). I remeber the first month, off ohh shit what have I done lol

  34. This article is amazing! Thanks! 1 week post-op

  35. I have been home from the hospital 2 days now and it still feels like the food demons are inside trying to pull my stomach in 25 different directions at the same time. I have never felt pain like this before in my life.

  36. Thanks so much for this post. I’m in that plateau just around a month of surgery. The scale has solidly wedged itself within the same 3 lb range and has refused to budge for two weeks now. I’ve worried, I’ve cried, I’ve whined. I’ve assumed I’m the only person in the world who won’t lose weight after this surgery. I can’t possibly eat any less! And lately I’m hungry all the time. GRRRRRRR

    BUT your blog has given me inspiration that I’m not the only one. Thanks so much!

  37. I am about 4 months into this nightmare of post surgery. I still can’t eat any meat, fish or really anything much at all. I throw up better known as the Dumping Syndrome all the time. My hair is falling out in clumps. I never feel good anymore. This surgery was a huge mistake and I regret it 100%. Yes I am down 68 pounds but it is truly hell. I wish I could eat and not be sick. Think twice before you decide to have gastric bypass it is not as easy as they make it seem.

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  42. Pingback: GREAT article/blog! - Coffee Talk - RenewedReflections

  43. I used to suffer from chronic cellulitus infections in my lower right leg. On average of every 6 weeks I did at least a 3 day bid in the hospital. Not fun at 22-24 years old. I suffered the infections for 2 years before doing something about it. I had surgery December 12, 2008. The morning of surgery I weighed in at 475lbs. After reading this article today, I weigh in at 315lbs. Sounds AWESOME right? Well it is. I havent felt this good since I was a sophmore in high school. My weight no longer holds me back from ANYTHING. I hate to seem like the oddball, but I found post-op life suprisingly “easy”. In the sense that I knew I made the right choice and had a better, longer, healthier, HAPPIER life ahead. Sure mt stomach hurt like hell when I got home, but I knew it wouldnt last more than 2 weeks tops. I slept about 18hrs per day my first week home. There wasnt any time to miss food. The liquid diet sucked sure, but the reward was and is huge. Did I miss food? More than anything. This was definatly the hardest break-up I’ve ever gone through. What did I do? I watched the food network like a moron. Did I cry when I watched it? ONCE!! The first time. Then I looked at my beautiful fiance and knew that the rest of my life with her was more promising than the rest of my life with food. So 8 months later, 160lbs lighter…I feel like I can take on the world. And Im going to soon. Extra skin…ehhh “yuck” I guess I would say. But it isnt all that bad. My belly doesnt hang low at all. My thighs are still thick but I can see my “best friend” without mirrors or sucking it in haha. Most of all, I dont like my “bingo arms”(flabby tricep area) but Im in the gym and trying to tighten up without surgery. So to cosmetic surgery recipents, I ask you this….which surgery was tougher and more painful to deal with?

  44. Well, I can’t say that my first 2 weeks have been anything like that. I mean, I already have more stamina while exercising and eating isn’t something I am looking forward to anymore, it is more of a drag now because I am forcing myself to consume more than I want to. I rarely have pain when eating as prescribed and I have had no dumping. The strangest thing is that I do not crave food at all, and more strangely, I do not crave cigarettes anymore either. I will admit those horrible first 2 days in the hospital the commercials were really annoying. But when I see them now, the fact that I’m not hungery makes it easy to ignore. My mom did the surgery about 1 and 3/4 years before me and hasn’t had the same experience I have had. I knew it would be hard and even broke down a little bit pre-op thinking about the fact that I couldn’t have a wedding cake at my wedding if I ever chose to get married, then I realized that I could have a cake, but it would have be the same cake that I would have needed if i were diabetic… which was my fate if I didn’t have the surgery. People who think this is easy are full of it, there are a lot of limitation in what you can eat and how much especially in the first several months. Food is no longer your perceived friends, nor is Starbuck. You can no longer socially and emotionally rely on food, and that is harder than most people realize, and they don’t realize how much they fall victim to that. People have always gathered and ate and up until recently a little fat was considered healthy, but we are learning that it is not. The trick that seems to be working for me is to think of ways to have your cake and eat it too, not literally though… I mean find ways that you can feel fulfilled and included without the need for food and learn to ignore chomping jaws and remember why you made this choice, not to be skinny but to be alive and healthy for a long time.

  45. I had my Gastric bypass in November 2007 and have lost 150 lbs. I am sitting in my house recovering from my third surgery. Don’t get me wrong all three of these surgeries have been for cosmetic reasons. Since Feb 2009 I have had a chin lift, face lift, tummy tuck, arm lift, thigh lift and breat lift. I couldn’t take all the hanging skin it truly bothered me. The excess skin, about 15-20 lbs, bothered me so much that I even considered gaining weight so I wouldn’t look so bad. I would not have actually done that but the thought did cross my mind. I am so happy I did the gastric bypass surgery, and the few side effects I have (constipation, feeling cold all the freaking time, and some dizzyness) outweigh the fact that I am not going to die from being FAT!!! I am 46 years old and am playing softball again. I also travel, but really travel…..I can actually leave the hotel and explore….So although, this article is true….very true…..I know that almost three years later it was ALL WORTH IT.

  46. never_fit_so_i_bought_earrings

    I am already so emotional because of this story… I am due on August 14th. Thank you for sharing. Looks like I need to prepare for the storm. Made my hubby read it too. lol Poor guy is going to take care of me.

  47. Due for surgery in mid August but im really not sure if im doing the right thing.

    I would love to just diet and eat sensibly but ive just nor been able to do it on my own.

    God this is a hard decision

  48. mrsmmmarsz

    Reading this has helped me… I am going to have the surgery in about a month or so… I am sort of freaking out a bit but I know that I have made the right decision and I know that I will be happy eventually.

    I am just so worried.

    I will continue to check in with this site though to keep everything in perspective… thanks for doing this!

  49. healthierme

    Fantastic article!! I started to search the internet for help because nobody seems to remember the first several months after surgery. I thought I was the only one feeling this way. Everyone else that I know that’s had the surgery seems so happy and don’t seem to remember these first few month. This article hit so many of my feelings! It made me feel like I wasn’t alone! Thank you sooooooo much for taking the time to write this!!!!

  50. Man oh man! This has saved me and helped me start thinking positive! I’m 18 and I had my surgery on February 2, 2009. Like you said, I am about to hit my one month mark, and the scale has STOPPED MOVING!! It has even moved up a pound once. I keep thinking to myself what am I doing wrong? Everyone I know that has had this procedure done has lost a tremendous amount of weight, and so far I have lost 23 pounds. Don’t get me wrong, 23 pounds is great, but I always catch myself comparing me to the others that have had it done. So, after reading this I feel a lot better! Thanks so much and I enjoy reading your stories!

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